Take a Guess
by Blue Funk
Summary: There's one small thing that's causing Zoro a mountain of problems, and its name ends in an 'i'.  One shot, ZoSan.


Just a little warning. This is shounen-ai, ZoSan. xD You don't like it, don't read it.

And two, this is written in-between The World Government arc and Thriller Bark. So yah, they're on the Thousand Sunny, and yah, the whole crew's there. Barring poor Brook, who I love anyway. I'm just trying my hand at something that's not Akuroku related. xD

Thank you to whoever scanned the Thousand Sunny layout, because... it's fantastic.

Also... apologies to anyone from my KH fics who thought this might be a new chapter of Special Discount or something. I dunno yet if i'm gonna update that. Mehbeh. We'll see. I'm still a bit overwhelmed at how many reviews that got, too xD

* * *

**Take a Guess**

* * *

It was supposed to be a day unlike any other. Just sailing along the sea, everyone doing what they usually did. Zoro would be training up in the Crow's Nest, now that it was equipped with an unbelievable weight-lifting room, thanks to Franky. Nami was busy mapping, now situated in the massive library, where Robin was also spending her time, perusing the interesting books that their shipwright had purchased.

And, of course, Luffy, Chopper, and Usopp were nowhere to be found. The last time anyone had seen them was on the third floor, but that had been a few hours ago. They were too occupied exploring the innards of their new, "SUGOI!" ship.

Franky was running maintenance on the engines, meanwhile. So that left Sanji. And it was perfectly obvious where he would be spending his time.

The new kitchen still needed to pass his inspection. And so far, it was going way beyond his expectations, including that lock that was installed on the huge refrigerator.

Humming softly to himself, the curly-eyebrowed cook busied himself with preparing a few snacks for his favorite girls in the world, Nami and Robin. Undoubtedly, they would appreciate a sample of his new cheesecake delights on this bright day at sea. Mayhap they'd even be so overwhelmed with the taste that they would declare their undying love for him...

Giggling to himself at the thought, Sanji balanced the tray on his hand and turned on his heel, about to leave the kitchen and go seek out the girls, but the girls came to him instead. Door swinging open, Nami entered first, flashing the blonde a brief smile before seating herself at the dining table. Robin followed afterwards, nodding a greeting as she placed her book on the table as well, sitting down across from the Navigator.

"Ahh, Robin-chwan! Nami-swan! Perhaps I could interest you in some of my new snacks that I made especially for you?" Sanji beamed, hurrying over.

"Not now, Sanji..." Nami waved the offer off, looking troubled. She stared at the door she had just walked through for a brief moment before looking back at the archaeologist. "I'm telling you, there's something up with that guy."

Robin laughed softly to herself, propping her chin on her hand. "Perhaps, but it really isn't our business, Navigator-san."

"He's our nakama! His business is our business!"

Not to be disappointed by the quick dismissal of his desserts, Sanji placed the tray nearby and couldn't resist but question the topic of the conversation. "Eh, Nami-swan, who're you talking about?"

"Zoro!" exploded Nami, growing ever more frazzled. "There's something wrong with him!"

An immediate change came over the cook. He smirked slightly, snorting to himself. "There's always something wrong with that idiot..."

"It's different this time! He's quieter. Luffy nearly broke his sword yesterday, but Zoro didn't even yell at him!"

Sanji shrugged, hardly concerned about the swordsman. "Maybe he was hung-over?"

"No, you watch, Sanji." Nami looked up at the cook. "At dinnertime, you'll notice. There's something definitely up."

Once evening rolled around and Sanji set out the main course of crisp Chipotle Shrimp with corn and scallions, the blonde went through the daily procession of yelling at Luffy that he wouldn't get seconds if he kept demanding food before Nami and Robin got their portion before noticing that something was missing. A quick look around the room informed him that both Zoro and Franky had yet to arrive for dinner. Franky was excusable, he had mentioned that the engine needed a small amount of maintenance and that he didn't need to eat anyway. But the marimo's absence... well, Sanji took offense to that.

"Marimo bastard, skipping my dinner, I'll tell him..." Sanji muttered darkly, quietly enough so that the two girls wouldn't hear such rude words that would be harmful to their delicate ears. But as soon as he sat down next to Chopper, the door banged open to reveal a very sulky looking Zoro.

"Oi, marimo, you're late!" Sanji growled from across the table.

Without saying a word or responding to Sanji's outburst, Zoro took his seat and served himself, not meeting anyone's eyes. That was odd in and of itself. The baka usually always had another stupid remark to shoot back after the cook insulted him. Nami and Robin immediately fell silent, appearing to dig into their food. But upon closer inspection, Sanji could see that they were watching the shitty swordsman.

"_At dinnertime, you'll notice. There's something definitely up."_

Keeping his attention to his food, Sanji regarded the man out of the corner of his eye. He looked as he usually did. Frowning and scowling, the swordsman was too busy shoveling food down his mouth to notice that half of the crew was regarding him with curious eyes. The second he had finished, he stood, dropped the plate into the sink, and stomped out again.

The rest of the meal was finished in silence. Nami and Robin remained to talk quietly while Sanji booted out Luffy, who was still hungry. Usopp and Chopper had shrieked their "thank you's" as they scurried out to do some more exploring.

"I think I've got it." Nami suddenly said while Sanji had gone to wash dishes. The grin on her face was spreading at break-neck speed. "It's almost impossible to believe, but I think I've figured it out."

Robin only smiled, watching her nakama put her thoughts into words. Even Sanji paused to listen, eyes frozen on the cutlery he had been scrubbing.

"I think he likes someone!"

_Crashclang_. Sanji had dropped the forks he had been holding in shock. Robin didn't seem surprised at the news at all, while Nami punched the air in triumph before settling down with a sneaky expression on her face.

"It happens to men all the time! They fall in love with someone and go completely soft! Now the question is, who?"

"It is really not our business to pry, Nami." Robin reminded the younger woman, standing and taking her book.

"Oh, no, I'll get to the bottom of this!"

The girls departed, still discussing their new discovery and leaving Sanji to mull over the new information. _Zoro _liked someone? The pissy bastard whose only loves were his swords, sleeping, and alcohol?

"... the hell?" muttered the cook, turning back to the unwashed dishes. Perhaps he himself should do some poking around. It might even be interesting to find out. At least then he could get a good laugh out of it, because whoever it was, Zoro never stood a chance with them.

* * *

The next morning found Zoro lifting his barbells on deck, shirt off, chest shiny with sweat in the bright light of the just risen sun. Wrinkling his nose slightly at the grunts issuing from the swordsman's throat, Sanji lit himself a cigarette as he walked across the grassy expanse to the older teen. He was going to get a straight answer out of the idiot in this encounter, no matter what it took. 

"Oi, marimo." he said, eyeing the green-haired man as he leaned against railing.

Zoro didn't respond, but glanced over at the cook briefly before going back to lifting. "Five thousand, seven hundred and eighty _three_..."

"Marimo." Sanji repeated impatiently, tempted to kick the damn weights overboard for how they seemed to take up all of the swordsman's attention.

"What?" Zoro finally grumbled, continuing to lift the barbells, the muscles in his arms contracting. He kept his eyes straight ahead, keeping his breath even. "Five thousand, seven hundred and-"

"Who do you like?"

"-eighty... _what_?" Zoro nearly dropped the heavy bar, eyes widening a fraction as he looked over at the painfully blunt blonde. "What do you mean, who do I like?"

"I mean..." Sanji exhaled a smooth stream of smoke, keeping his curiosity in check for the time being. "Who's caught your fancy? You seem to be really distracted lately. You're not acting like yourself. Not that I care, but Nami-swan seems to think it's important."

"And it's also none of your business."

Sanji blinked as the man returned to his training, then glowered. The idiot wasn't getting off that easy. "Wh-what? Shitty bastard, it _is_ my business! You're probably in love with Nami-swan or something, and if that's true, then it's my job to beat the shit out of you until you stop it!"

"Then I guess I have nothing to worry about, dartboard eyebrow." Zoro replied angrily, pausing again. What was the deal with him, anyway? Since when did Sanji actually care so much about him that he had to pester him like this?

"Then who is it? Tell me." The demand came in the form of a snarl as the cook took a step forward to face the other man.

"I'm not going to tell you."

"... at least give me a hint."

As low as that was stooping for Sanji, he was determined to find out. Something had this guy's haramaki in a twist, and it was sparking an interest in the blonde. This was obviously something important to Zoro since he wasn't willing to divulge any information.

Zoro snorted, smirking just slightly. "A hint? Are you serious?"

"Or you could always tell me, that would be easier."

Zoro considered. "Will you leave me the hell alone if I give you that hint?"

"Maybe. Depends on how good the hint is." Sanji shot back, grinning. This got another angry scowl out of Zoro, but he finally consented, resuming his lifting.

"The name ends with an 'i'. Now go away."

But Sanji didn't go away. He took a few steps back and took another huff of his cigarette as he thought. Names that ended with "i"... there were quite a number of possibilities. And like he had decided before... he was going to figure out this mysterious person _now_.

"Vivi?"

Zoro grunted in anger, almost losing count again. "What?"

"Is it Vivi?" repeated Sanji, raising his eyebrow. "Her name ends with an 'i'."

Holding back the frustrated moan that he was oh so tempted to expel, Zoro merely 'hmph'-ed and resumed the never-ending training. It appeared that he would never be rid of the idiot now until he got an answer. "No."

Sanji paused to think, blowing out smoke from his death stick every so often as he stared up at the clear blue sky. Another thought hit him. "Oh, that Marine lady! Who runs with Smoker, what's her name... Tashigi!"

A shudder ran through Zoro's body, but he shook his head nevertheless. His lip curled slightly at the thought of the Kuina look-alike. "Definitely not Tashigi."

The cook nearly pouted as another one of his suggestions was shot down. This might be harder than he thought. He took more time to muse about it, going through another cigarette as he did so. While he went through the ideas in his head, an amused grin tilted his cigarette into an obscure angle. Perhaps the idiot didn't know how to spell? Y made the same sound as I...

"Chimney?"

"_What? No_. That's just stupid." growled Zoro, finding his counting and lifting rhythm growing harder to maintain.

"You know that Luffy's name is spelled with a 'y', right?"

"Yes, I do, and no, it's not him, either."

"_Interesting. I suggested a guy, and he didn't argue about that..." _Sanji fell silent for another few moments, then abruptly tossed his cigarette overboard. If Zoro had bothered to glance over at him, he would have seen the steadily increasing angry look he was getting. Alas, he did not, so he was partially surprised when a leg came speeding towards his face. He only just managed to throw up one of the dumbbells to block.

Sanji glared at him, eyebrow twitching and leg frozen where it had been stopped. "Shitty swordsman, it _is_ Nami, isn't it? I'll kill you!"

"It's _not_ Nami, bastard cook!" hissed Zoro, pushed away the offending limb. He had had quite enough of this. He threw both training implements over his shoulder, preparing to head up to the Crow's Nest. Sanji wasn't having it.

Glowering with all of his might, the cook followed after the swordsman across the lush lawn built into the deck. "Well, it can't be anyone else! You already said no to Nami, Vivi, Tashigi, Chimney, and Luffy. Robin, Chopper, and Usopp don't have i's at the end of their name, and I'm not even going to suggest Franky because that would be wrong on too many levels to count. And _my _name..."

Sanji stopped dead, body growing stiff as he stared at the retreating back of Zoro. His jaw dropped open. No way... no _fucking_ way...

"... my name ends in 'i'..." He muttered, a chill running up his spine. "Oi, shitty swordsman! One last guess!"

Zoro paused at the mast, looking over his shoulder. He hadn't really been paying any mind to Sanji's ranting, but the cook's sudden change of tone caught his attention. "What?"

"Is..." Sanji swallowed, hardly believing that he was even goign to ask this. "'Cause, y'know, I'm just making sure... I mean, it goes with your clue, because my name ends in the letter and all..."

"What?" Zoro repeated, raising an eyebrow at how fidgety the blonde had become. _"He must have..."_

"Is it me?"

"_... figured it out."_

Instead of answering, the swordsman began his ascent to the Crow's Nest wordlessly. Hopefully, the bastard cook hadn't caught the flush that come over his face, or the slight grimace.

And amazingly enough, Sanji hadn't seen the marimo's face. But Zoro's sudden retreat had him jogging forward and looking pissed.

"Hey, where the hell are you going? Get back here, you-" Noticing that Zoro wasn't paying attention anymore and already too far gone, the cook dropped it. Left to mull with his thoughts, he retreated back to the kitchen, glancing left and right as he did so to make sure that no one had witnessed the exchange.

Behind a well-placed crate, Nami stifled a snicker. Jackpot.

* * *

Another day passed. The usual things occurred, as always. Except this time, Zoro didn't emerge for meals and Sanji kept mostly to himself. Nami and Robin didn't question it, but the secret glances the Navigator stole at the blonde during meals was enough to show that they knew perfectly well what was going on. Luffy, Usopp, and Chopper were too overwhelmed by the exciting ship to notice... and Franky, even if he did spot the change, didn't bring anything up. By the afternoon, however, Zoro finally emerged from the training room. Not really up to facing the cook, he had slept up in the Crow's Nest and even skipped breakfast. But he couldn't really starve himself anymore, he was hungry. Without thinking too hard, he decided to pay the kitchen a visit, Sanji or not. 

Which led to him stomping in through the door to see a startled blonde look up from peeling potatoes. Carefully avoiding Sanji's eyes, Zoro scurried forward, in a manly way, of course, to the storage room to grab a bottle of sake. Not the healthiest breakfast, but at this point, he needed the alcohol. Still pointedly ignoring the cook, he once again scuttled out of the kitchen in the manliest way possible. As soon as the door behind him shut, he let out a soft breath, astonished that he had even gotten away with that.

Hoping to get a nice nap after his sake, Zoro headed down to the mast to lie down and drink. He was about halfway through the bottle and settled nicely in the grass when the brightly shining sun, which had been warming his body in a pleasant way, was blocked out. Immediately, a scowl darkened his features as he looked up to see who was standing in front of him.

He didn't get a chance to voice his protests, however, because it was Sanji that was now moving to lazily crouch in front of him.

"Hey, Marimo..." Zoro didn't like how that single eye was glinting or how the cook's grin was widening by the moment.

"... what?"

"Wanna guess who I like?"

"I don't-"

"I'll give you a hint. Their name ends with an 'o'."

* * *

Ah haha, that was fun to write. Simply because I've never really written a real, thought out conversation between the two guys. It's way too enjoyable for me, I have to say. xD 

At the moment, it's a one-shot. If I ever feel up to it, I might just squeeze another chapter into this. We'll see.


End file.
